Kids' health：Four steps for fighting stress

Everybody gets stressed from time to time. 【小题1】 Some ways of dealing with stress — like screaming or hitting someone — don't solve (解决) much. But other ways, like talking to someone you trust, can lead you to solving your problem or at least feeling better.

Try taking these four steps the next time you are stressed：

(1)Get support. When you need help, reach out to the people who care about you. Talk to a trusted adult，such as a parent or other relatives. 【小题2】 They might have had similar problems，such as dealing with a test, or the death of a beloved pet.

(2)Don't take it out on yourself. Sometimes when kids are stressed and upset they take it out on themselves. Oh, dear，that's not a good idea. Remember that there are always people to help you. Don't take it out on yourself. 【小题3】

(3)Try to solve the problem. After you're calm and you have support from adults and friends，it's time to get down to business. 【小题4】 Even if you can't solve all of it，you can solve a piece of it.

(4)Be positive. Most stress is temporary (暂时的). Remember stress does go away, especially when you figure out the problem and start working on solving it.

These steps aren't magic，but they do work. And if you can stay positive as you make your way through a tough time，you'll help yourself feel better even faster. 【小题5】

   Friends should always be honest with you, right? So when they lie, it can  be really hard to take. You want to trust your friends and that means knowing that they'll tell it to you straight no matter what it is. But a friend who lies isn't always trying to hurt you. Why does this happen?

Protect your feelings

One of the biggest reasons friends lie is simply to avoid hurting your feelings.

Some people don't understand the difference between being gently honest with a friend and being so straightforward（直接了当的）that they leave a verbal wound. They choose to avoid these two extremes in the form of a lie.

What you can do: Encourage your friends to be straight with you. No matter what their answer is, let them know you are grateful for it.

They feel embarrassed

Sometimes friends will lie about things in their life because they are too embarrassed to admit the truth. Maybe they are going through a rough time and they just don't want you to know about it.

What you can do: Avoid trying to badger（纠缠）your friend into telling you what's wrong. Instead, make it clear that you are there for them when and if they are ready to talk.

Avoid an argument with you

Perhaps your friend knows that if they tell you the truth, you'll get angry with them. Avoiding conflict is not always healthy for a friendship because it allows problems to grow over time. If you have a bad temper（脾气）, your friend might try and avoid getting into an argument with you and instead just tell you what you want to hear.

What you can do: Make sure that if a friend tells you something unpleasant, you don't overreact. Consider what's being said and why your friend is telling you this. If you do end up arguing, do it in a respectable way.

Exclude you

Lying isn't always a sign that friends are trying to protect you, however. Sometimes they lie because they want to exclude you from their plans.

What you can do：When you find out with certainty that your friend is lying to you, try and face it. Be forewarned, however, that if a friend lies to begin with, he or she may lie when asked a direct question about his or her dishonesty. Go with your guts on this. If you feel your friend is lying because he or she doesn't want to be around you, that's your wake-up call to move on.

   I was never very neat, while my roommate Kate was extremely organized. Each of her objects had its place, but mine always hid somewhere. She even labeled (贴标签) everything. I always looked for everything. Over time, Kate got neater and I got messier. She would push my dirty clothing over, and I would lay my books on her tidy desk. We both got tired of each other.

War broke out one evening. Kate came into the room. Soon, I heard her screaming, “Take your shoes away! Why under my bed!” Deafened, I saw my shoes flying at me. I jumped to my feet and started yelling. She yelled back louder.

The room was filled with anger. We could not have stayed together for a single minute but for a phone call. Kate answered it. From her end of the conversation, I could tell right away her grandma was seriously ill. When she hung up, she quickly crawled under her covers, sobbing. Obviously, that was something she should not go through phone. All of a sudden, a warm feeling of sympathy rose up in my heart.

Slowly, I collected the pencils, took back the books, made my bed, cleaned the socks and swept the floor, even on her side. I got so into my work that I even didn't notice Kate had sat up. She was watching, her tears dried and her expression one of disbelief. Then, she reached out her hands to grasp mine. I looked up into her eyes. She smiled at me, “Thanks.”

Kate and I stayed roommates for the rest of the year. We didn't always agree, but we learned the key to living together: giving in, cleaning up and holding on.

My wife Laura and I were on the beach, with three of our children, taking pictures of shore birds near our home in Alaska when we spotted a bear. The bear was thin and small, moving aimlessly.

Just a few minutes later, I heard my daughter shouting, "Dad! The bear is right behind us!" An aggressive bear will usually rush forward to frighten away its enemy but would suddenly stop at the last minute. This one was silent and its ears pinned back — the sign (迹象) of an animal that is going in for the kill. And it was a cold April day. The bear behaved abnormally, probably because of hunger.

I held my camera tripod (三脚架) in both hands to form a barrier as the bear rushed into me. Its huge head was level with my chest and shoulders, and the tripod stuck across its mouth. It bit down and I found myself supporting its weight. I knew I would not be able to hold it for long.

Even so, this was a fight I had to win: I was all that stood between the bear and my family, who would stand little chance of running faster than a brown bear.

The bear hit at the camera, cutting it off the tripod. I raised my left arm to protect my face; the beast held tightly on the tripod and pressed it into my side. My arm could not move, and I sensed that my bones were going to break.

Drawing back my free hand, I struck the bear as hard as I could for five or six times. The bear opened its mouth and I grasped its fur, trying to push it away. I was actually wrestling (扭打) with the bear at this point. Then, as suddenly as it had begun, the fight ended. The bear moved back towards the forest, before returning for another attack — the first time I felt panic.

Apparently satisfied that we caused no further threat, the bear moved off, destroying a fence as it went. My arm was injured, but the outcome for us could hardly have been better. I'm proud that my family remained clear-headed when panic could have led to a very different outcome.