Why you shouldn't punish your kids for lying

Getting your children to stop lying is challenging. There are many influences（TV，movies and video games）in which lies are common. Children see parents lie to others，if only to be polite. Most parents add to that with tales about the lives and activities of Santa Claus or the tooth fairy. 【小题1】

The most common reactions to children who lie are explaining why it is wrong and punishments. 【小题2】 Here are three better tools supported by research to use instead.

Give praise: You could ask your child to say something that happened at school that is true. When your child obeys, praise him enthusiastically. Be specific. 【小题3】 and give your child a hug or a high five. Aim for one or two interactions（互动）like this a day. If you happen to "catch" your child in a lie，say something like，“That is not true and could get you in trouble outside of the home.”

Act as a model: Explicitly（明确地）tell the truth. This could be about something that happened when you were a child or something that happened during the day. It need not be dramatic. Another option is to play a game at dinner. Each person tells one thing that was true that day. Again，give a little praise to the child who normally lies if she plays along.

Decrease punishments and moralizing（说教）：They are unlikely to change behavior or develop the conduct you want. 【小题4】 Rather，use very mild punishments（light scolding，short loss of privileges，a brief timeout）. More severe punishments（shouting，taking away something for a week，hitting）are not more effective in actually changing the frequency of lying.

【小题5】 Usually they can be dropped by then. It is unlikely that lying will be completely removed，but with the right encouragement，it can be dramatically lessened.

   Today, we drive safer cars on safer roads, but most car accidents are the result of human error. 【小题1】 So it’s a good idea to review some basic rules for safe driving. Here are four driving tips that will help bring you and your passengers home unharmed.

Defensive driving includes keeping a safe distance and not speeding. 【小题2】 Accept small delays, such as staying in line behind a slower car instead of suddenly changing lanes.

Sometimes, it doesn’t matter how safely you drive. You are driving at the speed limit and obeying all traffic rules but someone else can crash into you. One good rule is to think everyone else on the road is a fool and be prepared for anything unexpected. 【小题4】 And it pays to be ready when you do.

Drivers need enough time to react if the car in front makes a sudden turn or stop. It can be too difficult for drivers to judge the proper distances while driving and the exact distance is adjusted by speed, so most experts suggest a “three-second rule”.

【小题5】 Drive below the speed limit if necessary, keep extra space between you and the car ahead, and be especially careful around curves. If the weather worsens, just find a safe place to wait out the storm.

Five Ways to Make Studying More Fun

Pick an area of the house you haven't used before. Use a stand-up desk instead of the kitchen table. Set up a space in your bedroom or home office that is just for studying. Put some time into making it a place you want it to be. 【小题1】

Getting together with a friend or a group of classmates can help you learn new study skills while you are still getting a few laughs in. 【小题2】 Pick one person and each of you choose a side to argue. If you have a group, they can join and vote the winner.

Plan scheduled study breaks every hour and take part in an activity you enjoy. Go for a quick walk, watch a short video, or eat a snack. 【小题3】 Before you take a break, write down what you have learned during your study time and add to this list each time you take a break.

By activating the left and right sides of the brain at the same time, music maximizes（使最大化）learning and improves memory. It's no secret that music helps with concentration and creativity.

【小题5】 If the weather is nice, head to a park or the beach. Study at your favorite coffee shop or bookstore. If you're active, you might want to try exercising to improve memory and thinking skills. Some of your best thoughts and moments of clarity（清晰）come when you're moving your body.

   What's holding you back from having the life or career you want？The answer for over 50%of people is fear. This can turn up in a variety of ways from doubt，worry，and anxiety. Maybe you've been told negatives（否定）and put-downs over and over again by other people. 【小题1】 It's completely normal to be afraid in these situations，but you have a choice in how you let those thoughts shape your actions.

【小题2】 What's at the root of it？Where do these thoughts come from？Really dig through the layers of the story you are telling yourself and find the reason. It's possible that this belief was given to you by someone else and you've just been accepting it as true.

Create a support system. While you are working，at meetings，or building a business，who is supporting you？Many people believe they are fine with "go it alone"，and don't need help. The reality is that most people who try to do everything on their own，waste a lot of time，and end up feeling burnt out. 【小题3】

Dare to dream. What are your dreams？【小题4】 In fact，all of our modern conveniences: electricity，cars，airplanes，and computers were once dreams. Imagine if those inventors held back because of what other people thought about them.

【小题5】 Understanding where a negative belief comes from helps you move through the fear. Then you can start taking measures that help you achieve your goals. This sounds simple, but in fact it can be the hardest part. Knowing something on an intellectual level isn't the same as putting it into practice. If you want any help around this, consider working with a coach.

   While some high school seniors begin to enjoy writing their college essay, others fail to see the importance of it. In some cases, these 600 words determine acceptance or a rejection. 【小题1】 It is also a process of self-discovery. Here are some helpful tips.

1. Have fun! When you get upset, it is reflected in your work. Relax, breathe and realize that this is the time to expose a side of you that the grades cannot.

2. Don’t settle for basics — be creative! 【小题2】 Stay away from volunteer work, your dead dog and vacations. Admission counselors (入学辅导员) see thousands of essays a month; make sure your essay is distinct from your experience and personality. Do not focus on what you think they want you to write, but what is actually significant to you.

3. 【小题3】 Although it is effective to appeal to the emotions of an admission counselor, I do not recommend writing an essay about sad stories. Self-pity can be annoying, and most admission counselors do not want that to be their first impression of you. 【小题4】 Make sure that the story is focused on your growth, not on the struggle.

4. Your essay is not a longer version of your resume (简历). If you send in a resume, there is absolutely no need to restate what is on it. Many students like bragging (吹嘘) about how much they do. It is amazing that you are involved, but admission counselors do not only want to hear about how much you do, especially if they already see this on your resume. 【小题5】

Good luck on your college essay!