We often focus on building relationships with others but we forget the important first step: being friends of ourselves. 【小题1】. How can we have good relationships with others if we don’t even have good relationships with ourselves?
The problem might be worse than we expect. Maybe we don’t like ourselves without realizing it. Here is a simple checklist: Is there anything you don’t like about yourself from these lists?
Your past: Maybe you have made mistakes in the past which you feel bad about. 【小题2】 . Even if that happened in the distant past, your mind still has a reason not to like yourself.
Your background: You might wish that you were born in a different family, or that you had different background. 【小题3】. They seem to get whatever they want effortlessly because of their background.
Your personal characters: You might have some personality traits that you don’t like. For example, you may be an introvert（内向的人）and you don’t like it; you wish you were an extrovert. Others might have better achievements than you, and no matter how hard you tried, it might seem impossible for you to match them. 【小题4】. Is there anything that resonates（产生共鸣）with you? All these give reasons to the idea that you don’t like yourself. That in turn makes it difficult for you to be a good friend to yourself.
【小题5】. Here are some tips:
Forgive yourself.
Accept things you can’t change.
Focus on your strengths.
Write your success stories.
Stop comparing yourself with others.
Always be true to yourself.
| A．Sometimes you might not believe yourself |
| B．You can do something to improve the relationships with others |
| C．Fortunately, there are always things you can do to fix the situation |
| D．Maybe you could not accept the fact that you are not as lucky as others |
| E．You might be disappointed with yourself on why you made such mistakes |
| F．That is the crucial（至关重要的）first step if we are to have good relationships with others |
| G．You might then think that it’s because you are not smart enough or don’t have enough talents |
