How to Listen to a Teen's Complaints
As your child reaches his teen years, he's likely experiencing a conflict(冲突)between his social and family lives. This often causes frequent complaining(抱怨). 【小题1】By listening to your teen's complaints in an active way, you make your relationship better and allow for better joint decision-making.
【小题2】You can see complaints from your teen as natural and positive, though the actual content of what he says might be negative(负面的). Believe that listening to your teen's complaints is a chance to know your teen better. By psychologically preparing yourself in this way, the conversation will go forward more easily.
Accept your teen's feelings. Understand that your teen's complaining behavior might be wrong but that his feelings are never wrong. Recognize that negative emotions are natural and do not easily fall under the control of teens or even adults. Note that your teen is at least handling his negative emotions in the right way—through words. 【小题3】
Listen patiently and carefully. 【小题4】Listen for the words in his complaints, such as "I am sick of this" or "It's unfair to me". This often shows his feelings. Through body language or eye contact, show your teen you are listening to him carefully.
React to your teen's complaint . 【小题5】 If you disagree, explain why. Finish the conversation by praising him for coming to you and expressing himself.
A.Do you think your reply is right? |
B.Allow your teen to express his dissatisfaction. |
C.Prepare yourself to listen to something negative. |
D.This is normal but not something parents should ignore. |
E.Parents should figure out what causes his complaint. |
F.If you agree with his complaint, discuss ways to solve the issue. |
G.However, keep in mind that accepting his feelings does not mean you accept his complaints. |