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                                                                                                        生 日
     ①30岁生日,我点燃了53支蜡烛。
     ②妻子边找酒边唠唠叨叨地说:“没听说谁的生日时提前两天过的,害得我啥也来不及准备。”桌上摆着生日蛋糕、啤酒、果仁、朱古力和许多带壳的炒花生,这最后一样是我母亲生前十分喜爱的食物。
      ③屋里的电灯灭了,烛光的火苗一齐跳起了“迪斯科”,为它们伴奏的曲子,是我指定的一首由民歌改编的轻音乐曲《天女散花》。(a)我的眼睛湿润了
      ④母亲穿着那件深蓝色夹衣坐在藤椅中,她已经病恹恹的,说话要强打起精神,只有脸上慈爱的神色是儿子每时每刻都能从愁容中分辨出来的。她说:“明天,是你29岁生日,过不过?”
        ⑤(b)我的心不禁震颤不已。母子异地生活多年,我从来就没有记住自己的生日,而她却像神圣的钟声,定时在母亲的胸怀里撞响。
        ⑥然而我不忍心让妈妈劳神,她患的是晚期肝癌,千里迢迢投奔到我所在的城市,唯一需要的是治疗和休养。我说:“妈,这次不过了吧,已经没这习惯了。”
        ⑦母亲的眼光停滞在我身上,良久又停滞在自己的足尖上,最后她说:“不讲究就算了。”话语里分明藏有叹息和莫名的遗憾。
        ⑧我们对他隐瞒了病情,但是她有了预感,因此,她有遗憾,我们是理解的。在她病逝之后我才发现,母亲深感遗憾的却不仅这一点。给母亲立墓碑时,查阅她的生卒年月,我吃惊地看到一行字:“生于1934年12月14日。”假如我们也想着给母亲祝寿的话,每年母亲的生日恰好是比我的早两天。
       ⑨我懂了,可是懂得太迟了。母亲在最后的日子里惦记着儿子的生日,何尝不希望儿子关切的问一句,头一次也是最后一次为她的生日做些表示呢!可是,儿子竟让她带着莫大的遗憾去了……
      ⑩妻子和牧牧笑咧咧地入席就座,一个为我斟酒,一个为我切蛋糕。
      ⑪牧牧举起酒杯,眨眨眼睛,大声说:“爸爸,祝贺你的生日!”
      ⑫(c)我百感交集,本来湿润的眼睛更无法睁开了,我把牧牧抱过来骑在膝上,和他头碰头地说:“今天不是庆贺,是纪念。来,牧牧吹蜡烛。”
      ⑬牧牧吹一支数一个数,吹到20支就发现了问题,“怎么这么多啊?”
      ⑭儿子和妻子都看着我,眸子里映出不同色调的烛辉。我对儿子说:“吹吧,吹完了讲个故事给你听。”
      ⑮牧牧吹完了,我当真讲了一个“故事”,还告诉他别学“故事”里的那个人。他听懂没有很难说,但垂头啜泣的妻子肯定是听懂了的。

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