We often focus on building relationships with others but we forget the important first step: being friends of ourselves. 【小题1】. How can we have good relationships with others if we don’t even have good relationships with ourselves?

The problem might be worse than we expect. Maybe we don’t like ourselves without realizing it. Here is a simple checklist: Is there anything you don’t like about yourself from these lists?

Your past: Maybe you have made mistakes in the past which you feel bad about. 【小题2】 . Even if that happened in the distant past, your mind still has a reason not to like yourself.

Your background: You might wish that you were born in a different family, or that you had different background. 【小题3】. They seem to get whatever they want effortlessly because of their background.

Your personal characters: You might have some personality traits that you don’t like. For example, you may be an introvert（内向的人）and you don’t like it; you wish you were an extrovert. Others might have better achievements than you, and no matter how hard you tried, it might seem impossible for you to match them. 【小题4】. Is there anything that resonates（产生共鸣）with you? All these give reasons to the idea that you don’t like yourself. That in turn makes it difficult for you to be a good friend to yourself.

【小题5】. Here are some tips:

Forgive yourself.

Accept things you can’t change.

Focus on your strengths.

Write your success stories.

Stop comparing yourself with others.

Always be true to yourself.

I'm sorry to hear that you feel lonely in the new school, because you find hard to make friends. Now, I'd like to offering you some advice.

Yours,

Li Hua

   If you're the kind of person who loves travel but finds it difficult to break down language barriers，you may want to check out ICONSPEAK，a T-shirt covered in basic pictographs（图画文字）ranging from clocks to bathrooms. Simply point to the symbol associated with your need，and hopefully，the person you're talking to will understand you soon. I can tell you that it's better than having to make gestures to strangers.

ICONSPEAK is the brainchild of friends George and Florian. They were traveling through Asia in 2013 and found themselves in a remote（偏远的）village with no vehicle，no tourism，and just some locals. The problems they had while trying to express their needs to the locals inspired them to start working on a simple yet effective solution to the language gap. Two years later，they came up with the ICONSPEAK T-shirt.“In the furthest and deepest corners of our world we were repeatedly left with no words，either in breathtaking awe（赞叹）due to the scenery or in empty silence due to our lacking linguistic talents，”its website states.“Such situations got us thinking about how to bridge language barriers with simplicity on a global level. The answer came to us after a remarkable experience in Vietnam: ICONs. Because with ICONs, you can SPEAK, and you can SPEAK to the world.”

The ICONSPEAK collection consists of three types of T-shirts — long, short, sleeveless — as well as large bags and hats that feature fewer icons. The products are available internationally through the website, with the founders attesting that they work anywhere in the world.“I have used it in Norway,”said George.“It works beautifully — the people you ask are surprisingly quick in getting what you want or mean since they are anyway thinking in a certain context. If you point to the bus and the clock on the shirt and you do this at a bus stop, anybody will know that you want to know when the next bus leaves.”

ICONSPEAK is a clear example that the answer to complex problems can be very simple. I have yet to try the shirt, but somehow I have no doubt that it actually works. It might not always help, but for common problems, like finding a telephone, the nearest hotel or an ATM, ICONSPEAK seems like a good solution.