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Empathy

    Last year, researchers from the University of Michigan reported that empathy, the ability to understand other people, among college students had dropped a lot over the past 10 years. That could be because so many people have replaced face time with screen time, the researchers said. Today, people spend more time alone and seldom join groups and clubs.

    Jennifer Freed, a director of a teen program, has another explanation. on the TV, and you're showered with news and reality shows full of people fighting, competing, and generally treating one another with no respect(尊重).  Humans learn by example—and most of the examples on it are anything but empathetic.

    There are good reasons not to follow those bad examples. Humans are socially connected with nature. Having relationships with other people is an important part of being human—and having empathy is important to those relationships. Researchers have also found that empathetic teenagers always have high self-respect. Besides, empathy can be helpful for loneliness, sadness, anxiety, and fear.

    Empathy is also necessary for a good leader. In fact, Freed says, many top companies report that empathy is one the most important things they look for in new managers. Social skills—including empathy—are a kind of “emotional(情感的) intelligence" that will help you succeed in many areas of life. “Tests results are important. But if you don't have emotional intelligence, you won't be as successful in work or in your love life,” she says.

    What's the best way to up your EQ(情商)? For starters, let down your guard and really listen to others. “One doesn't develop empathy by having a lot of opinions and doing a lot of talking,” Freed says. To really develop empathy, you'd better volunteer at a nursing home or a hospital, join a club or a team that has a diverse membership, have a “sharing circle” with your family, or spend time caring for pets at an animal shelter.

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关忠节公家传

鲁一同

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(选自《通甫类稿》,有删节)

【注】①律劳卑:英国贵族,第一任驻华商务监理。②大帅:这里指钦差大臣琦善。③铍:长矛。这里泛指刀枪。