A generation of parents raised according to the permissive principles of postwar childcare experts is rediscovering the importance of saying "No" to their children. They are beginning to reclaim the house as their own. Even spanking (打屁股) is back.

While today's parents do not want to return to the Victorian era (时代) — when children were seen, spanked, but not heard — there is a growing acknowledgement that the laissez-faire approach produced a generation of children running rings around puzzled parents struggling to restore order.

Janthea Brigden, a trainer with Parent Network, says: “The problem is that parents don't want all that controlling things. What they want is to be able to discipline (管教) their children through teaching and encouraging."

According to Steve Biddulph, the author of More Secrets of Happy Children, the permissive era was often just an excuse to ignore children. He believes discipline involves firm but friendly teaching and does not need to involve punishment. He teaches a method called "stand and think”, where a child is helped to figure out what is wrong and how to get it right. Mr. Biddulph understands parents using spanking, but lie is against it. "The happiest children are those who know Mum and Dad are in charge. As children grow into their teens, more negotiation can take place, such as: Prove you can be home safely by 1l pm, and we might let you stay out till midnight."

“There is no good evidence that an occasional, properly administered spanking is harmful in any way.”says John Rosemond, an American who has won a huge following by calling for "parent power". It is pure nonsense to believe that restricting children to their room as a punishment could make them have negative feelings about the room and cause sleep problems.

Mr. Rosemond tracks the overturning of traditional family values to the end of the Second World War. He blames the change of the American family into a child-centered, self-respect-oriented (以……为导向) unit on psychologists and social workers, who for 30 years have weakened traditional approaches. Previous generations of American parents raised children not by the book, but by self-evident truth, he says. Children should be seen and not heard. If you make your bed, you'll have to lie in it. He says that those phrases contain time-honored understanding and principles that helped children to develop what we refer to as the "three Rs" of parenting: respect, responsibility and resourcefulness.

   Today it is common to see people who walk about with colored wires hanging from their ears wherever they go. They move about in their personal bubbles, sometimes unaware of what’s happening around them. 【小题1】 Outside life is shut out. So are you one of “them”?

For me, walking around in my own personal bubble is perfect. 【小题2】 What’s even better, wearing earphones seems to give a signal to people which says, “I’m not available for chatting at the moment!”

Suppose, you’re at work and about to make an incredible breakthrough, but a colleague suddenly turns up. At this precise moment, the slightest disturbance would break your concentration. 【小题3】 Once again, those wires hanging from your ears would be sure to give that “Go away!” signal.

【小题4】It’s probably part of the growing up stage when they just want to ignore their whole family. While their mothers give them lectures about why they should do their homework, they can just turn up the volume on their MP3 player, smile, and say “Yes, Mum.” Problem solved.

Pretty soon, not only will we have pretty colored wires hanging from our ears—but also our brains will be directly plugged into some new high-tech instruments. We’ll be in a virtual(虚拟的) world, communicating with everyone else, or choosing not to, as we like. In this world, we will all be permanently plugged in. 【小题5】 And they are changing our social habits along the way.

In the end, there is a thin line between using technology as a tool for making life better and being a slave to it! It’s so strange—suddenly, I don’t feel like wearing my earphones anymore.